Robins Reliant, Billinge Bilge...

And so to the final Saturday of the season and a 12.30 kick off to fit in with the Mancunian FA Cup Final 🙄 Fittingly it's Manchester Road in Knutsford for the 2023/24 season's swansong and a Cheshire League Division One fixture between Knutsford FC and Billinge New Street FC.

Knutsford FC, the Robins, was formed in 1888, playing on the Heath. The first known record is of a 14-0 drubbing of Manchester 'Aberdeen' Club on 29 December 1888. Subsequent organised friendlies, local leagues and cup ties prefaced the Reds joining the Manchester Federation League in 1898, winning the title in their first season. Thereafter Knutsford Athletic played in the Altrincham & District Amateur League prior to World War II.

The current Knutsford FC was formed on 22 February 1946, joining the Mid Cheshire League, subsequently rebranded as the Cheshire League. Relegated to Division Two in 1977, The Robins moved back up to the Premier tier in 1983 as Division Two was disbanded. 

Knutsford was crowned as top level champions in 1995, 2012, 2013, 2016 and most recently in 2018. Indeed I was at the Reds' last game of that season on Whit Bank Holiday Monday against Malpas FC at Manchester Road, paying my £2 to park at the near end next to the clubhouse and changing rooms. Opposite side dugouts with the ground bounded by the A50 on one side, trees on t'other 🙄

And what a game 😊 Six goals in the first half (3-3) and eventually a 4-4 draw, with Alex Hughes scoring all four for the visitors 😃 It was Knutsford's only draw of a season that produced 24 wins and 3 defeats... That point elevated Malpas to the runners-up position on goal difference, but still 21 points adrift...

However the Robins were relegated in 2022, after a post season 9 point deduction, to Division One - 12th of 14 last time, and they will finish 5th of 16 this term after a late surge of form (one game left - away at Malpas !) - but winners last month of the Cheshire Amateur Cup 1-0 against Premier Division champions Poynton.

Billinge Football Club was founded in 1988 by Phil Middlehurst, originally playing in the St Helens Combination at Eddleston Fields. The club joined the Mid Cheshire League (now Cheshire League) in 2004 and moved from Eddleston Fields to purpose built facilities at Barrows Farm in 2008.

That same year The Storks achieved promotion to Division One, which became the Premier Division in 2014, before suffering relegation during the following year in 2015. Two years on the club went up once more before demotion back to Division One in 2022.

The club merged with New Street FC of Rainhill, formerly of the South Lancashire Counties Football League, last summer to become Billinge New Street FC - the Storks & The Street. 10th of 14 last time, this term they end 13th of 16.

Sadly Manchester Road where the Robins would have been in red, black and white and the Storks in claret and blue does not happen this time. A journey past Tim Burgess Chainsaw Sculptor, Gauntlet Birds of Prey Eagle & Vulture Park, Fryer's Garden Centre and Cottons Hotel & Spa also does not occur 😒

At a very late stage the fixture is postponed due to a failure to fulfil - New Street unable to raise a side... So instead a rapid dart to Manor Farm on Ridgeway Road in Timperley, with numberplates 11 CRY, BRA55Y and OH10 MRS on the way 😊

And a very entertaining Manchester League Division Four clash, in front of a crowd of 7 - including other spectators who were en route to Knutsford.... The game kicks off 15 minutes early at 11.30, between Baguley Athletic Reserves and Walshaw Sports Reserves, and sees the visitors and champions, edge home 4-3 😀

Open Mikes Earn Their Stripes.... !!

And so to Ditton, on the outskirts of Widnes, and St Michaels Catholic Primary School, for a Cheshire League Division One clash between St Michaels DH FC and FC St Helens Reserves.

The Mikes, motto 'Fortis et Vici' (strong and I conquered), were established in 1966 - the DH is an abbreviated version of Ditton Hall, where a banished Jesuit community from Germany settled. Playing local league football, the Saints were Warrington and District Premier League champions in 2021/22.

Stepping up to the Cheshire League Division Two St Michaels finished runners up in their inaugural season and were promoted to Division One. 

This season they have started with three victories, away at Vulcan (2-1) and at home to the not so mighty Atoms of Daten (4-0) and Bollington (3-0), a disappointing 3-3 home draw to Sandbach Reserves, having been three up at the break, and a right thumping at Golborne Sports (1-6), followed by last weekend's 3-1 reverse at Styal. 

The Saints currently sit 11th of 16, but with games in hand.

FC St Helens, 'The Stripes', was established in 2014 in the heart of the town, originally as St Helens Town's reserve side. Their motto is 'Simul Nos Firmiories' - Together We Are Strong...

The club started in the West Cheshire League, before moving to the Cheshire League Division Two in 2015 and achieving promotions to Division One in 2016 and the Premier in 2018. 

As champions in 2021/22 The Stripes were promoted to the NWCFL Division One North, replacing, ironically, former FA Vase winners St Helens Town, who finished bottom and were relegated. They finished third in their first NWCFL season.

The Reserves side joined the Cheshire League Reserve 2 Division and achieved promotion to Reserve League 1 in 2016/17. 

As runners up in 2022 the Stripes' Reserves were elevated to Division Two and a 4th place finish last time out was sufficient to see a further move up the league to Division One - four wins, a draw and two defeats, and an abandonment (due to alleged racial abuse) thus far this season leaves them fifth - but having played more games than their rivals.

But not to St Michaels Primary School - the pitch 'touch and go' after the incessant rain - and a late switch of grounds to Windleshaw Sports Club in St Helens. A strange journey featuring a horse drawn hearse, with plenty of 'manure' on the road afterwards, and a lime green tuk tuk parked across a driveway in Altrincham. 

Numberplates LM04 YUE, a limousine, LU51LLE and PU11EYY feature today, as do roadworks on Dunham Road and dreadful driving - exiting the retail park apparently enables you to use both forward lanes, and a roadhog trying to overtake in single file traffic at a red light. Plus a van with trailer advertising Hot Products Cock Oil....

Into Warrington and out on the A57 , the Pink Eye building, Crosfields ARLFC, Snoutwood Trotters (!), then Trigger Pond, Christmas Tree Farm and Bargyloo Farm.

That brings me to Bold Heath, Thatto Heath, Clock Face - its rugby league side Clock Face Miners ☺ Then Sherdley Manor, the Dream sculpture up in the hills, Arthur Fleischmann's 'The Miner' at Cannington roundabout, and via The Glass Horse to central St Helens. To Denton's Green and Tennis Street leads to Windleshaw Sports Club. There is ample parking for a crowd of 21.

So not....

Windleshaw Sports Club ground is tree lined, a storage area next to the bar and outside seating and a very plush rest home adjacent with first floor balcony. At the top end is a playing field and a minuscule covered area, with a new 50 seat stand on the opposite side now operational.

So instead...

St Michaels are in change grey and black, sponsored by G Sinclair Electrical Services, and FC St Helens Reserves, sponsored by TD Construction Testing, are in red and white stripes. What follows in the autumnal sunshine is a very open and entertaining match.

After St Michaels have a goal ruled out on 7 minutes, they take the lead just before the quarter hour - a farcical own goal resulting from a back pass, a bobble on the penalty area mud bath and an air shot from the keeper. No matter as the Stripes equalise four minutes later from a defensive error with an almost apologetic scuffed finish that creeps inside the post - the same post they hit on 21 from a lob.

Thereafter a slight lull until injury time when St Helens have an effort palmed over and then the Mikes retake the lead, a deflected cross tucked away. St Michaels then spurn three glorious chances in the remainder of stoppage time, but still lead 2-1 at the interval.

The second period is breathless, with the action started 10 minutes in when the Stripes' keeper, who is not having the greatest of games, drops a straightforward cross, leading to a tap in. 70 seconds later it's 4-1 to the Mikes, a fine team move ending with the ball calmly slotted home.

But St Helens fight back and on 61 score from a cushioned header across the Mikes' custodian. However it's 5-2 to the away side three minutes on; a wonderful centre forward's goal, twisting and turning, beating three defenders before rolling the ball beyond the hapless netman.

There are no more goals, despite the home goalkeeper being substituted with 20 minutes to play - replaced between the sticks by the Stripes' captain. Mikes do hit the frame of the goal and so it finishes 5-2 to the visitors - their scorers Ryan Hunter with two, Ben Mahoney, Matt Williamson and that comedic own goal..... and St Michaels move up to fifth, overtaking FC St Helens Reserves on goal difference.

Winnington Explore Every Avenue - But Stymied By Vulcan Bombshells !!

And so to the Moss Farm Leisure Complex in Winnington and a Cheshire League Division One fixture with massive promotion ramifications between Winnington Avenue and Vulcan.

Winnington Avenue YC 94 was established, unsurprisingly, in 1994. Initially playing in the Crewe and District League, where they were champions in 2014/15, Avenue joined the Cheshire League Division Two in 2018. Unable to play at their nearby home venue at Jubilee Fields, requiring extensive modifications, Winnington have taken residence at Moss Farm for their Cheshire League adventures.

Promoted at the end of a Covid ravaged 2019/20 campaign Avenue currently sit second on 60 points with two matches to play - today and next Saturday at Blacon Youth, who can also mathematically still go up.

The modern day Vulcan FC was established in 1955 in Newton-le-Willows as a works team by its employer, Vulcan Foundry, a locomotive builder, and its workers - but historically its roots can be traced back to 1923/24. Vulcan Institute had two ignominious seasons in the Lancashire Combination, finishing next to bottom on both occasions in 1963 and 1964, before disappearing. 

Vulcan Newton joined the Lancashire Combination in 1979 and became a founder member of the North West Counties Football League in 1982 - but it only lasted 2 years. A merger saw the club change name to Vulcan Clock Face before settling on Vulcan FC - all incarnations spending the vast majority of their time plying their trade in the Warrington & District League.

The current Vulcan FC, who were long time leaders of Division 1 this time but now overtaken by promoted Whalley Range, stepped up from the Warrington & District League to the Cheshire League Division Two in 2017. Promoted as runners up in their first campaign Vulcan lie third now, behind on goal difference to Avenue, also with 60 points going into their final game of the season. As for the club badge.....say no more !!

The M56 and off at junction 10, the Stretton Fox on one side, the Partridge on the other (how apposite !), with numberplates BA55 EAD, SW15 SHY and GD 16ERS (gravediggers ?!) alongside Apple Jack's Adventure Farm. I join the A49. past Brookside and Greenwood Fisheries and the Chetwode Arms, then Whitley, Antrobus St Marks Primary School, Little Leigh and into Barnton, home of Hormbrey Butchers. 

Right at Anderton Boat Lift and The Cods Pollocks chippy as I reach Winnington, beyond the cricket club and Winnington Avenue (the street), home of Jubilee Fields, and onto the Moss Farm Leisure Complex, next door to Winnington Park County Primary School.

The complex is the home of the Cheshire FA, Northwich RUFC and Northwich CC, with the 4G caged astroturf surface surrounded by 3 rugby and 2 football pitches, a social club and tall trees - and Winnington Park RUFC in the distance. 

The advertised 1345 kick off proves to be incorrect as we get underway at 1401.

But before the match gets underway the first bombshell.... Vulcan's home game against Blacon Youth on 12 February, which finished 1-1, is overturned due to an ineligible Blacon player. Youth are deducted one point and that, plus a 'failure to fulfil' at Denton Town means Blacon cannot be promoted. Vulcan are awarded the win and move onto 62 points.
 

Avenue are in red and white chequerboard, sponsored by D & R Pipe Fabrications and Vulcan in change grey and yellow, sponsored by Cannon Electrical Services. In overcast conditions, the sun occasionally breaking through, there is a healthy crowd of about 75, swelling to three figures by the end.

Vulcan start much the better, amidst a flurry of free kicks conceded by Avenue. On the quarter hour the Bombers have a header from yet another free kick deflected over the bar, and another header from a corner is just past the post.
 

It takes 35 minutes for Winnington to create a chance - Vulcan's keeper standing tall to parry from the centre forward. No matter though as a minute later Avenue fashion another opportunity and Callum Payne's shot is excellently saved, but from the floor his rebound trickles in. A shot into the side netting nearly doubles the advantage but Winnington lead 1-0 at the break.
 

The second period is not easy on the eye with Avenue using every excuse to waste time, conjuring up multiple injuries, and hanging onto their slender lead. That said their rearguard action is quite magnificent, blunting the Vulcan attack of any clear chances.
 

That is until the second Vulcan bombshell on 69 minutes when a free kick is beautifully delivered into the box and volleyed home by Scott Fisher. It's all Vulcan now, but Avenue regain their defensive resilience, and frustration boils over into a flare up, which appears to include a Vulcan head butt - the referee does nothing other than award the away team a free kick for the original wild challenge.
 

With Vulcan going for the win, and promotion, that leaves gaps at the back and Avenue create chances on the counter attack, three wastefully spurned and one cynically eliminated with the away custodian marooned on the half way line....
 
That brings us to 8 minutes of injury time, and in the 100th minute Avenue's keeper pulls off a stunning point blank save to keep the scores level. Ultimately it means Whalley Range are crowned as champions and Winnington need to win at Blacon next Saturday in the last league game of the season to be promoted - otherwise Vulcan will erupt and go up....

Red Alert - Hurricanes Warning !!!!

And so to Hurricanes territory in the leafy environs of Holmes Chapel - Holmes Chapel Hurricanes FC hosting Malpas FC today in the Cheshire League Division One, in a rearranged fixture that Malpas FC failed to fulfil earlier this season.

Holmes Chapel Hurricanes FC was founded in 2000 by Chris Rogers as a vehicle to enable his son and friends to play football. Initially playing local league football, and based at Holmes Chapel Leisure Centre, The Hurricanes moved up to the Cheshire League in 2018, finishing next to bottom of League 2 in their first term. 

After the Covid aborted 2019/20 season, last year's curtailed campaign saw Chapel place 4th of 11 which was sufficient to secure promotion to Division One - where they sit 6th of 15 with 42 points from 27 games; this their final game of the 2021/22 season.

Malpas FC, from the Oxhays - the town twinned with Questembert, lesser known brother of Camembert - was established in 1901 and, after playing locally in the Crewe Sunday League, joined the Chester League, moving to Saturday football. After winning consecutive Premier Division championships in 1983 and 1984 Malpas moved up to the Mid Cheshire League (now Cheshire League) in 1985. Relegated to Division Two in 1991, the club was promoted back two seasons later.

Demoted again in 1997 Malpas moved up to the Cheshire Premier in 2015, and finished runners up - a campaign that ended with a thrilling 4-4 draw at champions Knutsford FC. They again finished runners up in 2018 but were relegated the following season, and lie 12th, and safe, with 25 points from 26 games this time, defeated 6-2 at Parklands on Thursday, and finishing their season at Styal on Tuesday.

So amidst blue skies and a gorgeous sun drenched spring afternoon it's beyond Em's Bench, Nerd (a board game outlet), which opened at 12 noon today, the derelict Wheatsheaf, a striking bluey purple Californian Lily and then Full Circle Partners (Funerals Your Way). That leads to the M6, where the graffiti has largely been expunged, and a one junction stomp, bypassing the trailers advertising Blue Lagoon Spas, Are You Pregnant ? and Orange County CBD. Today's car numberplates are 5UC, EA63ERLY and HE1 8ABE.

Then onto Chester Road, Cotton Farm and signs advertising Knutsford Races tomorrow before I turn into Selkirk Drive and Holmes Chapel Comprehensive School - the Leisure Centre alongside. The 3G pitch is at the back of the sports centre, with the other 3 sides tree lined. There are four shaded metal benches and a concrete walkway on the one accessible side and a shed outside the mesh.

Chapel are in red and black, sponsored by Manifest Fitness and the George & Dragon, Malpas in change blue with red trim - their sponsor Highgate Garage. Due to an overrunning children's pirates session the game eventually starts at five past two, in front of a 'crowd' of 5 - which steadily increases to 8 and a huddle in the corner, the nearest point to the bar !!

The Reds start the better with Sam Hatcher forcing a decent save before Malpas create a golden opportunity, one on one, but chipped wastefully over the bar. Oli Hewitt hits the post for the Hurricanes when he should have scored when played through, but it's a frustrating half that ends scoreless with Chapel on top but profligate and tame with their shooting.

Matters take a turn for the worse four minutes into the second period - Chapel's keeper lacking control from a back pass, the ball pinched by a Malpas forward who is then cynically brought down. Yellow card, penalty and 1-0 to the visitors - but this is their only shot on target during the entire match....

Gradually the Hurricanes gather a second wind, and on 62 minutes Matt Haynes' long throw falls at the feet of Hewitt and he stabs home the equaliser from close range. Ten minutes later Charlie Rodick produces a sumptuous finish from the corner of the penalty box following a one two and Chapel lead, after which they hit the woodwork twice and Hatcher misses, awfully, a sitter.

No matter as five minutes on he redeems himself, dummying the keeper, to score an open goal and it's 3-1. Then on 82 minutes a poor defensive clearance ( a mal pass ??) falls to Ben Law and his 25 yarder into the roof of the net is the goal of the game.

Four minutes from time Hurricanes go 5-1 up, the ball recycled and cut back to Hatcher who beats the keeper and a defender on the line. To add insult to injury Malpas are reduced to ten men just before the death - a second yellow for dissent - as Chapel finish the season on a high.

Vulcan Bombers At The Death After Hurricanes Force !!

And so what should have been the leafy Cheshire environs of Holmes Chapel doesn't happen - the original fixture postponed at the last minute and the rearranged game moved to Middlewich Town FC. Tonight's match is a Cheshire League Division One clash, 'The Bomber Derby', between Holmes Chapel Hurricanes and Vulcan.

Holmes Chapel Hurricanes FC was founded in 2000 by Chris Rogers as a vehicle to enable his son and friends to play football. Initially playing local league football, and based at Holmes Chapel Leisure Centre, The Hurricanes moved up to the Cheshire League in 2018, finishing next to bottom of League 2 in their first term. 

After the Covid aborted 2019/20 season, last year's curtailed campaign saw Chapel place 4th of 11 which was sufficient to secure promotion to Division One - where they sit 5th of 15 with 39 points from 22 games.

The modern day Vulcan FC was established in 1955 in Newton-le-Willows as a works team by its employer, Vulcan Foundry, a locomotive builder, and its workers - but historically its roots can be traced back to 1923/24. Vulcan Institute had two ignominious seasons in the Lancashire Combination, finishing next to bottom on both occasions in 1963 and 1964, before disappearing. 

Vulcan Newton joined the Lancashire Combination in 1979 and became a founder member of the North West Counties Football League in 1982 - but it only lasted 2 years. A merger saw the club change name to Vulcan Clock Face before settling on Vulcan FC - all incarnations spending the vast majority of their time plying their trade in the Warrington & District League.

The current Vulcan FC, who were deposed as league leaders of Division 1 on Saturday by Whalley Range, stepped up from the Warrington & District League to the Cheshire League Division Two in 2017. Promoted as runners up in their first campaign Vulcan have 53 points from 23 matches this time - second place but Winnington Avenue 94 and Blacon Youth have sufficient games in hand to overhaul them. As for the club badge.....

So with unexpected rain falling, it's beyond Dunham Forest Golf & Country Club and bypassing Dunham Massey, scene of Bruno Fernandes' car crash today. Onto the A556, The Windmill at Pickmere, Tabley House, Dove Barn Weddings, The Smoker at Plumley, the Weaver's Whistle and Birches Remembrance Park & Crematorium before I hit the roadworks at the Roberts Bakery roundabout in Rudheath. Car registrations tonight are 247 DR (pandemic related ?), T111 DUN and SIIILYS.

Left onto the A530 and past Croft Lodge Kennels brings me to the outskirts of Middlewich and Finney's Lane, home of Middlewich Town FC. The ground is now surrounded by a new housing estate, a massive crane in the background at the far end and trees and a church opposite the main side.

Inside is a mini astroturf pitch, clubhouse with beer garden and the covered stand with two rows of plastic seats - entry via stairs and then latched doors ! A railed walkway encircles the pitch and there is a small covered shelter agin the away dugout; there is also a separate entrance to the ground at the town end. The crowd tops out at a dozen, give or take the odd dogwalker....

Holmes Chapel are in red and black, Vulcan in change grey and orange as the match kicks off at 6.30pm. The Hurricanes have much the better of the opening stages, Charlie Rodick with a one on one and then a loose back pass creating another clear opportunity - on both occasions Vulcan's keeper stands tall and saves well.

However Chapel take the lead on 27 minutes when Ally Harrison's cross is headed home by Tom Fagan-Hall, with the away custodian nowhere. That lead is doubled on 42, with Harrison's shot from outside the area dived over by the keeper. Vulcan do start to create chances before the break but half time sees the Hurricanes lead 2-0.

The second period is characterised by Holmes Chapel's organisation and graft, which restricts Vulcan to one clear chance - expertly saved by Jason Currie - and long range efforts that come to naught.

A vivid sunset heralds an astonishing last five minutes plus stoppages. The Hurricanes are reduced to ten men on 85 minutes due to a sinbinning for dissent; the Vulcan corner after is headed onto the underside of the bar and scrapes in to make it 2-1.

Two minutes later and shambolic Vulcan defending results in their keeper's third mistake, pulling down a home attacker for a penalty. Statuesque from the spot kick and Sam Hatcher makes it 3-1.

Then a minute into injury time Vulcan win a contentious free kick which is bombed in and falls into the corridor of uncertainty and is touched in. Two minutes on a Hail Mary bomb finds a Vulcan head, over the stranded Currie, and it's 3-3 !

That's how it ends - an unbelievable last five minutes providing a sinbinning, a penalty and four goals ☺. Vulcan go back top by a point but have played two games more than Whalley Range....

Chapel's Prayers Go Unanswered - Absolutely No Styal Whatsoever.....

And so after Storms Dudley, Eunice and Franklin have wrought havoc, putting paid to last weekend's fixture with a reformed Blacon Youth, it's to Altrincham Road in Styal for a Cheshire League Division One clash between Styal FC and  Holmes Chapel.

A football club existed in Styal in 1912, and this is taken as the year of the club's foundation. The club started out playing in the Lancashire and Cheshire League (L&CL).

Immediately after the war the Villagers played in the local Wilmslow & District League until they received an invitation to rejoin the L&CL, where they remained for a quarter of a century. They joined forces with the cricket club, building the present pavilion in 1958 and the land on which the ground stands was placed in trust by then owner HG Greg Esq.

Styal joined the Mid-Cheshire League (now the Cheshire League) in 1977 and, after various league reformations and two relegations and one promotion, moved up from Division 2 as runners up in 2001. Champions in 2007/08, the Villagers were relegated to the renamed League One in 2017 where they remain - 7 wins and 13 defeats this time around.

Holmes Chapel Hurricanes FC was founded in 2000 by Chris Rogers as a vehicle to enable his son and friends to play football. Initially playing local league football, and based at Holmes Chapel Leisure Centre, The Hurricanes moved up to the Cheshire League in 2018, finishing next to bottom of League 2 in their first term. 

After the Covid aborted 2019/20 season, last year's curtailed campaign saw Chapel place 4th of 11 which was enough to secure promotion to Division One - where they sit 5th of 15 with 32 points from 18 games.

Through Timperley, House of Boba, Marvel Guitars, Barberian, Harry's Den, the Frank Sidebottom memorial and Hale Country Club & Spa, curiously hosting Bowdon RUFC. Then into Roaring Gate Lane with number plates M15 ADO, DOO8Y, U D18K ED (unbelievable !!) and a van advertising Home James (plumbing) into Altrincham Road, past Peacock Farm, home of Kirk Butchers, 'Traditional Aged Cured Beef', The Ship Inn, and opposite Apprentice Lane, I reach Styal Sports and Social Club.

The road is completely jammed with parked cars for the adjacent Quarry Bank Mill and there is minimal space at the Club - but the lack of parking leads to inventiveness and a 13 point turn, avoiding the mud. Inside there is The Alan Jones Stand, a small covered terrace, next to which is the only seating - a bench occupied by 2 adults and one child. This is agin the sports club, backing onto the cricket pitch and pavilion - the clubhouse selling Mobberley Brewhouse Unchained this afternoon.

The Villagers are in yellow and blue, sponsored by Lowery Capital, Chapel in red and black - their sponsors Manifest Fitness on the front, George & Dragon on the back - as the sides kick off against a tree lined backdrop and drenched fields. Breezy with sporadic sunshine and on a very soggy pitch, matters get underway at 1355 - the crowd topping out at 15, mostly away fans. The referee is a silver haired, moustachioed pensioner, and subject to much vitriol from both benches.

Styal start the stronger and have a golden chance on 20 minutes - a woeful back pass produces an even worse spoon over from the ensuing one on one. Chapel's skipper amazingly heads wide from 3 yards seven minutes later.

Then, on the half hour, the talking point of the half. The Villagers create an opportunity, scruffily shooting beyond the Hurricanes' keeper, and the ball is messily diverted back from over the line and onto the post and cleared. The referee is handily placed on the half way line (!) and awards a corner - which hits the bar.....

The second half is abject, with a surfeit of hoofing, overhit passes and appalling shooting. The two main chances, one for either side, come from one on ones involving rounding the keeper but woeful control means they come to nought.

The match plays out to a goalless draw, but not before some spectator abuse leads to Styal's left back taking offence leading to a contretemps, involving (presumably) the spectator's son (number 15) squaring up - handbags.....

The game festers to a close with more unseemly scenes at the final whistle.....

The Moore The Merrier - Village People Cruisin' In Seventh Heaven....

And so to Chapel Lane and Partington Sports Village (Partington Leisure Centre in my day !!) for the Cheshire League Division One clash between Partington Village FC, playing their opening game of the season, and Moore United FC, who have already played three league matches, garnering a single point thus far.

Partington Village FC was established in 1939, playing in lower local leagues, and hitting the heights in recent years. Four consecutive league titles, culminating in being crowned as league champions of Cheshire League Division Two at the point of null and voiding, sees Village play their first ever game at this level - and there is a League Cup Final against Styal to play for next month.

Moore United from Latchford, Warrington, was established in 1946. Billy Green's Red and White Army finished next to bottom at the curtailment of the last campaign.

 

On a cold autumnal day, with a biting wind, the four mile, ten minute journey conjures up more than expected... The roadworks that have paralysed Manchester Road have thankfully finished, so it's past Trafford College, the proposed, currently rejected, 5G mast site, then Bramley Farm, the council tip and Roe Clare Cattery.

 

Numberplates SS10UXS and ST11NTZ appear plus a German Schuller lorry with the slogan 'Kuchen fur Leben' - so not much repeat business there !! It's a shockingly rutted road, hemmed in by rampant hedges before I turn left onto Chapel Lane. Partington Sports Village is on the outskirts of Partington and affords plenty of parking next to the astroturf pitch and netball/ basketball courts. The indoor leisure centre is to my right, and the open fields reveal a partially taped off pitch, scene of today's game, and, in the distance, a rugby pitch. Next door is Broadoak High School, and up top playing fields and woods adjacent to Warburton Lane.

 

The referee arrives in his car shortly after me, already fully kitted out, but there are no assistant referees, with the lines being run by a member of each team's coaching staff. No admission fee, naturally, and a crowd (counted by me !!) of 24, including babies - although this is fairly fluid, given the comings and goings, and indeed a 25th spectator rocks up just after the hour mark.

2pm kick off with Village in all maroon, sponsored by Atlantic Timber, and Moore in change blue with white flashing, sponsored by Deliveroo. The first few minutes see Partington dominating early exchanges, but their players are seemingly more interested in the fortunes of Manchester United in the early kick off at Brighton, rather than the game they are actually playing in.

 

Once that is all sorted Village take full control, and on 18 minutes score their first with the ball driven home from a blocked shot. Three minutes later an unconvincing lob from a through ball just reaches the net, and a further three minutes on Partington strike the bar, but that is with the aid of a Moore hand. The penalty is summarily despatched to make it 3-0.

 

On 32 minutes an inadvertent deflection off a United defender plays in an offside Village striker who scores easily. 4-0 and Partington hit the post with the last kick of the first period. Half time lasts barely five minutes - industrial language on one side of the pitch, laughter and merriment on the other....

 

Under a minute after the restart and a lovely team move, culminating in a sublime one two, results in a tap in, Josh McVety's hat trick and it's five ! Thereafter Village go off the boil for a while and fall asleep seven minutes later, allowing Moore to score what proves to be a meaningless consolation.

 

Normal service is shortly resumed and with twenty minutes left Tykio Williams races on to a  through ball to score, and Partington then hit the bar and force two great saves. In the final minute the ball is recycled twice in the penalty area resulting in a simple tap in for the outstanding Zak Ashford. 7-1 at the death..... Village is more, and Moore is less !!!